Bad Movies
Aug. 31st, 2009 09:50 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chuckroEdgehopper hosted a bad movie night this weekend. Despite the RiffTrax accompaniment, they were still really, really bad.
Glitter's biggest problem was that it lacked any sort of narrative thrust. There was very little real conflict, there weren't any overarcing themes. Honestly, it was kinda boring--essentially the They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot trope over and over again. Also, for a Mariah Carey vehicle, it had strangely little of her performing. I think it says something when the glaring anachronisms are the least of a movie's problems.
Battlefield Earth was typical bad sci-fi worldbuilding (Why/how did all of that technology survive a thousand years? If you have interstellar transporters, why do you need to mine inhabited planets? If your planet's atmosphere can be ignited by radiation, why don't you have a filter on your transporters? Or a waystation?) combined with John Travolta playing the dumbest evil overlord I've seen outside of a Conan story. Seriously, his character on Welcome Back Kotter was smarter.
The Room is in the running for worst movie I've ever seen ever. This is Death Ship levels of bad. The first half-hour has all the plot of a softcore porn movie (and the leading lady has all the acting skill of a porn actress), but then it devolves into inexplicable scenes featuring characters with inexplicable motivations, abruptly dropped plot threads, a character that vanishes and is replaced by someone who's never introduced, and Tommy Weiseau's Braziaustriatiastan accent. Oh, and Weiseau's rampant and blatant misogeny as demostrated by the female characters in the film. By the time the ending arrives, you're cheering for it; it's probably not the effect he was going for, but it's the only pleasant moment in the movie.
Glitter's biggest problem was that it lacked any sort of narrative thrust. There was very little real conflict, there weren't any overarcing themes. Honestly, it was kinda boring--essentially the They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot trope over and over again. Also, for a Mariah Carey vehicle, it had strangely little of her performing. I think it says something when the glaring anachronisms are the least of a movie's problems.
Battlefield Earth was typical bad sci-fi worldbuilding (Why/how did all of that technology survive a thousand years? If you have interstellar transporters, why do you need to mine inhabited planets? If your planet's atmosphere can be ignited by radiation, why don't you have a filter on your transporters? Or a waystation?) combined with John Travolta playing the dumbest evil overlord I've seen outside of a Conan story. Seriously, his character on Welcome Back Kotter was smarter.
The Room is in the running for worst movie I've ever seen ever. This is Death Ship levels of bad. The first half-hour has all the plot of a softcore porn movie (and the leading lady has all the acting skill of a porn actress), but then it devolves into inexplicable scenes featuring characters with inexplicable motivations, abruptly dropped plot threads, a character that vanishes and is replaced by someone who's never introduced, and Tommy Weiseau's Braziaustriatiastan accent. Oh, and Weiseau's rampant and blatant misogeny as demostrated by the female characters in the film. By the time the ending arrives, you're cheering for it; it's probably not the effect he was going for, but it's the only pleasant moment in the movie.
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Date: 2009-08-31 06:17 pm (UTC)